| | The pouring rain subsided to a drizzle after the funeral service. He
watched dispassionately as his mother's coffin was buried in the earth.
His ties with her through out these past few years had been strained.
She didn't understand the young man her precious little choirboy had
turned into. In all honesty, he admitted he didn't understand himself
at times.
It
saddened him that he hadn't been able to come visit her as often as he
would have liked. But his father had forbidden him to return alone, for
the distance was too great. But still, he felt guilty that his mother
had died alone, and that strangers were the ones to find her cold body.
His
father stood aways, quietly talking to the pastor and thanking him for
the lovely sermon he had read for the 'ex-wife'. 'The ex-wife', that
was how his father referred to his mother these days. Nary a mention
about what had led to the divorce nor why they had seperated on such
bad terms. One would have thought his father hated her guts for merely
being alive.
But still, he saw the old man crying softly the
night before the funeral when he had thought no one was looking. That
sobered him somewhat, at least somewhere inside the old fool remembered
the emotions that had stirred him into marrying her when they were
younger.
He spoke to his father briefly, informing he was going
off to have a cigarette. The old man's face went stony but he nodded
reluctantly. Smiling spitefully at his father, he walked away and
headed under the trees to smoke.
He noticed the girl staring at
him again, she had been looking at him ever since he had walked into
the church hall. Something about her irritated him, and yet he couldn't
place her face in his memories. Probably some Sunday school kid he used
to read the bible with he mused thoughtfully.
To his surprise she approached him and talked to him. "I'm sorry," she said.
He
offered her a cigarette, ignoring her previous comment. She looked as
if he had offered her a snake. She turned to walk away, when he spoke,
"Sorry about what?"
"About your mother." she said, turning to face him.
"Oh. That. Why?" he asked.
"What?.. I mean she's dead...uh..passed away. Anyways, I'm sorry you lost your mother." she stammered.
"Oh, you're trying to make me feel better, eh?"
"Yes.."
"Why? I don't know you. Or do I? Are you one of those mourners that were hired?" he said, poking fun at her.
"Whaa...t? Hired?"
"It's
a Chinese thing. You wouldn't understand" he sighed, " So what can I do
for you? Or what can you do for me?" He said cheekily looking her up
and down.
She was beginning to feel irritated with his high and
mighty attitude and his constant poking fun of her. "What's wrong with
you, don't you feel sad that your mother's dead? How can you be
disgracing her by smoking at the burial ground?" she snapped.
"Don't you have any shame at all?" she demanded.
Instead of the expected outburst from him, it seemed she had made him smile even wider.
"You've
grown up well, haven't you?" he said, cocking his head to look at her
closely. "I remember you now! Pity you're still as uptight as usual."
he tapped his cheek thoughtfully looking at her. He smiled again and
leaned over, catching her by surprise when he kissed her on the lips.
After
she overcame the shock, she narrowed her eyes angrily and threw a fist
at him. The next thing she knew was that she was now flat on her back
on grass and all the breath had been knocked out of her.
"I'm
not six years old anymore, don't think you know me, you stupid brat. I
grew up without my mother, idiots like you wouldn't understand what she
means to me." he said softly, standing above her.
"No soft hands
were there to wipe my tears away, to tell me I had tried my best and
that it was okay to fail. I had two choices, waste away emotionally or
stand on my feet and claw my way up."
"You're sorry? For what?
Having a good life and not being able to understand? Don't make me
laugh." he flicked his cigarette away and turned away from her.
"Dream of me." he winked.
"Asshole!" she shouted at his retreating back. |
| | Posted 6/9/2005 3:33 AM - 24 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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